Christmas and Coffee

Hi All,

I have to admit, the blogging has been slow in recent times and I would like to blame it on the festive season, everyone needs a break! I trust you all had a great Christmas and good New Year celebrations. I was lucky enough to find some sun in lovely little Clyde in Central Otago.

Anyway, the filming is well underway on the 'Stealth Cat' documentary and photos of the field action will be posted here soon. However, with the majority of activity centred on the Mid-Canterbury district we have had ample opportunity to sample local wares and hunt out the odd coffee. The results have been quite disturbing so I would like to offer this blog as a public service announcement for any caffeine conscious persons setting out on the road in the South Island.

Tips:

1. Do not trust an automatic coffee machine to deliver anything other than mud. It is a crime when coffee merchants are charging $3.50 for what is essentially a cup of nescafe with heated milk powder.
   
2. If the cafe attendant has more upper lip hair than yourself then turn around and walk out. No males (or females) with moustaches can brew a decent blend I have discovered.
   
3. If the coffee machine has an old tea-towel draped over it retrace your steps. This is a definite indication that not many coffees are served and the machine is likely to spit out regurgitated mess from a cup brewed a week ago.
   
4. Double shots should be paramount so be concerned when the machine is stocked with single-shot porta-filters.
   
5. Check the grinder, if the beans have already been ground then its a sure sign that things will not be that fresh.
   
6. Any signs outside cafes that read "Stewarts or Robert Harris" indicate a foul tasting brew.
   

These are but a few tips for spending money wisely in the pursuit of a pure shot of black gold.
While I am on the subject of spending money wisely, it has not escaped my radar that coffee merchants have upped their prices recently and the average price for a sit-in flat white is $3.50. For some reason, takeaway cups seem to be larger than sit-in cups and therefore the rationale seems to be $4.00 for a flat white even though the patron will not be using the facilities?

While I am perplexed by that I am quite annoyed when asked to pay the same prices for a long black! This is can not fathom, the long black contains the same amount of caffeine extracted from the same quantity of beans and is often topped up with 'hot water'. NO MILK. Even with my challenged arithmetic I can work out that Nil Milk =$0. Since when did hot water cost the same amount as 400 mls of milk?

Just so you are all aware, a perfect flat white should look something like this:



Lets just say I will make my own long blacks at home on my machine that consistently produces a better brew than some of the gruntier commercial machines being operated by coffee novices. It seems that living in Dunedin we take it for granted that a good coffee is only one block away, there are dozens of great places to sample a brew.